REAL SPORTS

A comedian once mused that it would be better to see actual mascots of professional football teams fight than watch the teams play each other. I whole-heartedly agree.

Here is a little play-by-play (imagine a South African accent):

The conditions are hot and dry... It doesn't seem to bother the Bills, though, as they confidently enter the Lion's den doing their trademark Super Bill Shuffle. But this is their turf and the Lions are not going to take that brash behavior lying down... Detroit's captain, Lion-O Richie, calls the first play. It's an all out the blitz... The Bill's retreat but the slow moving rookie receiver out of Dartmouth, Bison Leftwhich, was caught from behind and dragged out of bounds... In vintage desert swarm defense, the Lions chew on his hobbled body. WAIT what's this? There appears to be something coming coming out of the water. Its, a the Florida Gator. Possibly Tim Tebow. Someone needs to remind him he's in the wrong league... Looks like the Lions are going to keep this Buffalo Bill for themselves... They're dragging him back inbounds... Tebow had enough, he's heading off to do a mission in Malaysia... Now there is some action on the Buffalo side of the ball... Looks like they are lining up in a strange formation... I don't believe it, the old student body right. Well, I haven't seen this since '59 and the Annexation of Puerto Rico...The herd apparently is taking the offensive... They've seen enough humiliation of their rookie teammate... Hold on there's a whistle... Offsides on the Bills... The herd quickly regroups and makes another run... This time its successful... Bison Leftwich is back on his feet... Do you believe in miracles?... He's going to be alright folks... It really looked like he wasn't going to get up from that one. He was down there a long time... The Bills look rejuvenated... They're chasing the Lions all over the field... The Lions are running scared... That's it sports fans... Two teams entered only one can be victorious... Both squads competed valiantly, but today's winner was the American tourist who's community college photography classes really paid off.

Just watch the clip.

Bonus: ALL TIME FAVORITE LION VIDEO